Does altruism exist?
Is there such a thing as altruism? It’s an old question, with a contact high from so many dorm room debates and jittery after too much time in coffee shops, but I’m wondering if you can help me with it.
All of the earnest high schoolers writing “Volunteer work in Costa Rica” on their college applications, remembering the joy of going to that beautiful country, having so much fun with their friends, and helping those people build that library. Are they inspiring examples of how the precious few lucky enough to be born into sufficient affluence and power can help share the gifts of their birth? Are they ambassadors towards a better tomorrow? Are they exploitative colonists using the Third World for their own gain?
The kids were doing just fine at smiling before we showed up. But hopefully we helped with a few more?
I remember an Australian I met a couple weeks before K and I went to Africa to lend a hand. With that beloved Australian gift for plain talk, he said with no malice or scorn “You’re not going there to help those kids. You’re going there because it makes you feel good to do it.” He leaned back to wait for my response.
I wasn’t sure what to say. “For starters, I don’t know how much help we’ll really be, but I hope we can do a little something useful. And yes, I do expect it will feel good. But I don’t think that invalidates anything. I think it’s okay for someone to feel good about helping others.”
We painted, did crafts, and I got to play with some wiring.
He nodded and bought me a coffee the next morning, but the issue of exactly who was benefitting the most never did sit easily in me, and it feels extravagant and uncomfortable to use the word “altruism” when talking about myself.
Tomorrow I have an interview about a position teaching English to refugees. I’m not going to lie, a big part of why I want the job is to feel like I’m doing something useful, and to get out of my stale routine. I will benefit from the classes. Will they? I’m not sure; it remains to be seen if I can be an effective teacher in those circumstances. What if they don’t learn much? Does it matter if I feel good about helping? Are we all just using each other? (I look forward to your comments.)
Well now, I think there ain’t nothing wrong with mutual benefits. I quote from Wikipedia:
“Mutualism is the way two organisms of different species exist in a relationship in which each individual benefits from the activity of the other. Similar interactions within a species are known as co-operation.”
It is only natural! Good luck with your interview…
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I like it! No need to judge win/win scenarios.
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Like most things in life, teaching is an exchange of energy, and balance: you put something in and get something out, and so do your students! So no need for a guilt trip. Good luck with that interview..
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Thank you! It went pretty well. That place has a lot of energy… Now I just hope I can give back a decent rate of return on the gifts they give me.
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I don’t think that getting enjoyment from something necessarily makes it not altruistic.
I admit there’s probably something admirable when someone does something they honestly dislike because it helps someone else (or because they think it’s necessary that someone do it and they’re best-positioned for it), but folks don’t do very much of that.
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I feel the same way, that there is something….better…when the deed is unpleasant to the doer. That’s odd, I’d never pulled that out into the sunlight before. I’ll have to ponder that.
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You have thought it over, and now you deal upon the basis of your best judgment. You have already done more than most.
I do hope you benefit from it too ❤ 🙂
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I’m positive I will! (I actually didn’t mean to make this post about me, but once I started writing it I realized I could add the thing about the teaching in there as an example.) Happy hiking in 2015!
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Thanks a lot 🙂 You too when you got the time.
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Great post. I have the feeling the teaching of English will have lasting effect with some, not as much with others. What has a more profound effect may be the intention behind the action. This can be read in one’s eyes and body language. True kindness and compassion are universal. I commend you on your chosen journey!
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I hope you’re right, because I have much more confidence in my ability to show that I care than I do in my teaching skills at the moment!
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I’ve come across the following idea in the ‘words of the sages’: Act as if you can do a thing, before there is any evidence, create the space for the miracle to manifest and it will find its way home to you… something like that!
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Good is good in my book. It doesn’t matter much why it is done, but that it is done. Also, I think people should brag more about it instead of quietly gooding about because then more people will feel peer pressured into volunteering, or donating, or whathaveyou. It could be…
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That’s an interesting idea, to create a broad peer pressure towards communal activities. It makes sense to me, and sounds like a good thing, to counter the American obsession with self-sufficiency, which is all-too-easily confused with egocentricity. (Now I just wish I had something as awesome and dedicated as a Peace Corps term to brag about…. 😉 )
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haha. I’ll never be able to wash the hippy out of my resume, now.
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Teaching and learning are gifts. It works both ways.
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I completely agree. Now I just need to make sure I can effectively fulfill my side of the bargain!
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I read your post several days ago, and alas, I had to stop myself from shouting out loud since I’ve been asking myself the same question for quite some time. Many times, when I say I work for Save the Children to people I first meet, they seem to admire me for my “kindness” and for “how meaningful my job is” (they don’t even know what I do exactly). Every single time, I feel so bad about me bragging about it. I have my own purpose, and though I am very happy that I am a part of something good helping children to have better lives, I know exactly that more than anyone, I don’t deserve such compliments. What if they know my true intend? Will they turn their back on me?
Having that said, I don’t feel bad for doing my job with a purpose other than a purely good cause. I just feel bad when people are misled and look at the wrong me.
About your general question “Does altruism exist?”, I wonder if you ever heard about Ayn Rand’s philosophy? To some extent, it is worth-considering. If you ask me, I would say, yes, we are all using each other, even when it comes to emotion.
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I’ve noticed that people I meet doing incredible work generally don’t want to hear compliments about it. I wonder if contact with those in need reminds them of who the real heroes are… And oy, I wasn’t expecting Ayn Rand! On a broad level, I tend to think her opinions are justification for a lot of the economic misbehavior and problems in our world today, but I hadn’t considered it in terms of philanthropy… Very interesting. Thanks for commenting!
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I just said Ayn Rand can answer your question, but I don’t think it could be a pleasant answer. Ayn Rand gave no room for “altruism” In the most common meaning of it. A rough but interesting doctrine. Nice weekend!
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I confess I haven’t actually read her books, but from what I’ve heard, you’re right, she definitely does give a concrete answer on the idea of altruism. And I think you’re right, it’s not a pleasant answer. I wonder how politics would be different, if less of them followed Randian ideas, since it seems like a love of altruism should be an all-out requirement for public service. From now on, any politician who loves Ayn Rand should be immediately voted out of office! 😉
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